Hephaestion's Day Off
by PhaiFan
Summary: Hephaestion is overworked. Alexander decides to give him a break.
1. Chapter 1

_As usual, I own nothing related to the movie, the characters, etc. I would love to have Hephaestion for myself, but somehow doubt Alexander would be willing to share. :)_

**(sort of takes place after the events of Ebb & Flow)**

**Hephaestion is overworked. Alexander decides to give him a break.**

**(Yes, I know I like to write about an overworked, stressed Hephaestion. It's fun to find solutions to his problems).  
**

* * *

Hephaestion leaned back in his chair and casually tossed a wadded parchment across the room. It bounced off the wall and landed next to the rest of the papers he had wadded up and tossed.

Paperwork. Gods, did it never end? Maps, inventories, troop census, correspondence…the list went on. He was surrounded by stacks of things awaiting his attention.

He looked around the room, wondering what would happen if he "accidentally" knocked over a brazier and burned up all these papers. Hmmm…an appealing thought.

Chuckling at his own silliness, he picked up a stylus and began working on the map he had been drawing up for Alexander's latest project. He had docks and shipyards to design, a city wall to build, letters he needed to write, plus he had really wanted to write to Aristotle if he could find the time to do it.

After a while, he stood up and stretched, deciding to take a short break. A little wine sounded good, so he poured himself a cup and took a drink, enjoying the feeling of warmth as he swallowed it down. He leaned his back against the wall, closed his eyes and sighed.

His door suddenly flew open, and he didn't even need to open his eyes to know who it was. No one else would have come in without knocking or being announced.

Alexander breezed into the room, feeling great and in the best of moods. Everything was going well here in Patala. The work on the docks was well under way, he had the locals under control, and the army was resting and stocking up on supplies. Hephaestion, as always, had been doing an outstanding job. He dropped down into Hephaestion's chair and pushed around the papers on his desk.

"You work entirely too hard, Hephaestion."

Hephaestion rubbed the back of his neck and squeezed his eyes shut. "Alexander, I'm only doing the things that YOU wanted me to do!"

Alexander frowned. Was he really such a slave driver? He took note of stressed expression on Hephaestion's face and felt a little guilty. He stepped towards him and reached out his arms.

Hephaestion stepped forward and allowed Alexander to pull him into an embrace, releasing a deep breath and dropping his head to Alexander's shoulder.

Alexander ran his hands over Hephaestion's back and gently rubbed his neck and shoulders. He could feel the tension in the muscles as they bunched under his fingers. There was no doubt Hephaestion needed a break.

Suddenly a slow smile spread across his face.

He stepped back slightly, holding Hephaestion at arms' length and smiling at him. "Hephaestion! I've got a great idea!"

Hephaestion groaned inwardly. This could not be good. "And what, pray tell, is this idea of yours?"

Alexander released him and dropped down into the chair again, leaning back and propping his feet up on the desk. "I am giving you a day off! You're working too hard. You take a day for yourself to do whatever you want, and I'll handle all this stuff for you!"

Hephaestion shook his head quickly. "No, Alexander. That's very kind of you, but I'll be fine. I've got everything under control here, despite how it looks" he waved his hand at the mound of paperwork on his desk. He didn't want to say it, but he knew that Alexander had no idea what he was about to take on.

"Come on, Hephaestion! Don't you think you need a day of rest? You've been at it non-stop since we arrived here, and you're way ahead of the schedule I had set for the construction projects." He cocked his head and studied Hephaestion briefly, noting the exhausted slump of his shoulders. "I can tell you're worn out. How can you be at your best when you're obviously exhausted?"

Hephaestion sighed. There was no denying that he was burning the candle at both ends, but he had to stay on top of things and was not very good at backing off once he had his mind set on a job. "I am tired, Alexander, but really…I'm fine. Things are going well, and I want to keep it that way."

Alexander pulled his feet off the desk and sat up straight, looking at Hephaestion sternly. "Hephaestion, don't make me pull rank on you."

Hephaestion dropped his head with a deep sigh. There was no winning this battle. "Yes, my King. What are my orders?" He was resigned to whatever Alexander would have him do, but was also being a bit sarcastic.

Alexander caught the sarcasm but let it go. He spoke again with authority. "Your orders, General Amyntoros, are to take tomorrow off. You are not to touch any paperwork. You are not to try to supervise any of the construction. You are not to do anything in relation to our work here. You are to sleep late if you want, hide out in your room if you want, take a ride out of the city if you want…whatever you want to do that does NOT involve work." He smiled. "I don't care what you do, Hephaestion, as long as you don't do any work."

Hephaestion took a deep breath and released it slowly. "As you wish, my King."

Alexander grinned happily. "I'll take care of everything, Hephaestion! You'll see!"

Hephaestion had a really bad feeling about this.


	2. Chapter 2

Hephaestion woke early the next morning, stretching and yawning in the cool morning air. He threw the bed coverings aside and sat up on the side of the bed. His stomach rumbled, so breakfast was definitely on the agenda. He washed and dressed in simple chiton and cloak, sitting down in his desk chair to tie the lacings on his sandals. He looked at the piles of papers, nearly grabbing a stylus to start work when he remembered Alexander's "orders" to him.

"I can do this" he thought. He looked around his room before turning and walking out, closing the door on his mountain of work before it got the best of him. He had his orders, after all.

He sat and chatted with Nearchus, Ptolemy and Perdiccas as he ate his breakfast.

"So, Hephaestion, are you going to go and supervise the builders today on that new section of the dock we are starting on?" Nearchus asked.

Hephaestion shook his head. "Nope. I will be away most of the day today, so I'll have to check up on their progress tomorrow."

Leonnatus had come and sat down across from him. "I didn't know Alexander was sending you on another mission! I thought he wanted you in charge of this one!"

Hephaestion smirked. "I have orders from Alexander. I am not to do any work today, at all." He gave an undignified snort. "He seems to think I need a day off."

"Well", Ptolemy smiled gently at him "I must say I concur. You have worked non-stop for weeks now." He studied his face briefly. "My friend, your exhaustion shows on your face. If Alexander has ordered you to take a day off, I'd say he has reason to do so."

"I suppose…" Hephaestion mumbled, still not at all pleased with the prospect of being out of touch with his engineers and builders all day. "Alexander said he would handle everything in my place today." He made a face and sighed. "I will do as he asked, but I don't have to like it." He gave a half smile and shook his head. "This was one battle I did not win."

He rose from his seat and looked at his friends. "I suppose I'd better get out of here. If I stay, I'll end up doing something I've been ordered not to do. Health to you, my friends." He turned and headed back to his quarters.

The others looked at each other after he left. Ptolemy voiced the thought that they all shared. "Alexander is going to try to handle everything in Hephaestion's place?" He shook his head. "May the Gods help us all."

* * *

Hephaestion stood inside his quarters, looking around and trying to decide what he was going to do with his day. He was perfectly aware that if he stayed in the city he would end up working, or at least trying to. He decided he needed to get away for a while, someplace where he could relax. If he was honest with himself, he desperately needed that.

"Damon!" he called out to his favorite page.

The youth dropped the armor he had been polishing and stood at attention in front of Hephaestion. "Yes, Commander? What do you require?"

Hephaestion laughed softly. "Relax, Damon. We have a day off today. I would like you to pack a bag. Pack food for a midday meal, some wine, a couple blank parchments and a stylus, and blanket please."

Damon nodded. "I will have it done right away, sir." The boy turned to leave, but was stopped by a hand on his arm.

"Pack enough for two, Damon. You're coming with me." Hephaestion laughed at the youth's startled expression, and shook his head as a wide grin broke across the boy's face.

"Yes, General! Right away!" He rushed out of the room.

Hephaestion was still chuckling softly. Ah, he remembered what it was like at that age. He wanted company for the day, but not someone that he would end up talking shop with. Damon was friendly and his company was enjoyable. Hephaestion would often sit and talk with him, sharing stories of battles and of his younger days with Alexander. He knew the youth had a terrible crush on him, which he found flattering. If he had been interested in doing so, the boy would have been a good choice for his eromenos. As it was, he had no time for that sort of thing, nor did he have the desire for it.

He ordered another of his pages to go and prepare their horses for a day trip. Damon returned quickly carrying a pack to put on the horses. "I have everything you asked for, General."

"Great! Shall we?" He motioned for Damon to follow him out towards the stables.

Their horses were ready. Damon put the pack on the back of his grey mare and mounted up. Hephaestion swung up onto the back of his big chestnut stallion and spoke briefly to a couple of the guards that had accompanied him.

"If anyone needs me, I will be unavailable until sometime late this evening. I do not require an escort, so please go and rest. You get a day off, too." He smiled at the slightly shocked guards who merely nodded.

"Okay, Damon, let's go. We're going to one of my favorite spots. I think I might be looking forward to relaxing after all.

He thought briefly about what sort of mess Alexander might make of things, but pushed it out of his mind. No, this was his day to relax and he was going to try his best to do just that.


	3. Chapter 3

Hephaestion felt great. He had managed to keep from worrying all day, and simply relax and enjoy the day. He and Damon had shared a meal, played knucklebones, shared some stories and swam in the river. Now he was leaning back against a large oak tree writing a letter to Aristotle, something he had been trying to find time to do for several days. Damon was lying on his stomach on a large rock, soaking up the warm afternoon sun.

Hephaestion finished his letter to Aristotle and rolled the parchment carefully, placing it back in the pack they had brought. He stood and stretched, smiling and feeling at peace for the first time in weeks. Maybe months. It was now early evening, and he decided they should probably head back. It would be time for their evening meal soon, and he had a taste for some of Amaltheia's honey cakes.

Damon was still sunning himself on a rock like a big lizard. Hephaestion crept up beside the sleeping youth and crouched down beside him. "Wake up, you sluggard!" he said in a stern voice, biting back a smile.

Damon jumped and scrambled to his feet, his eyes wide and a terrified look on his face.

Hephaestion burst out laughing at the horrified expression on the boy's face. He waved a hand at him. "Relax, Damon. I'm teasing you!" He smiled, and noticed the page exhale a long breath in relief. "We do need to be getting back, though." He tossed Damon the chiton he had left on the ground beside him. "Get yourself dressed and pack this stuff up."

They gathered their things and mounted up. The ride back to the city was a quiet one. Hephaestion simply enjoyed the sound of the wind, the singing of birds, the steady cadence of his horse's hoof beats, and Damon's cheerful humming. It had been a most enjoyable day indeed. He would have to thank Alexander for ordering him to take the day off. He hadn't realized how badly he had needed it.

When they reached the stables, they dismounted and led their horses to one of the waiting grooms.

"Damon, take the pack back to my quarters. Give the scroll to a messenger. I want it sent to master Aristotle. Have my attendants draw me a bath, and…well, I guess that's it." As Damon turned to leave, Hephaestion stopped him. "Oh, and Damon?"

"Yes, General Amyntoros?"

"Thank you for your company today. After you do those things I asked, you may have the rest of the evening off."

"Yes, sir!" Damon grinned from ear to ear before hurrying away to complete his tasks.

Hephaestion chuckled. The kid was cute. He started towards his quarters, but he didn't get very far.

"Hephaestion! Thanks the gods you are back!"

Hephaestion turned to see Nearchus trotting up to him wearing a frown. The man looked quite irritated, and Hephaestion cringed slightly. So much for his relaxing day.

"My dear Nearchus, you look troubled! What is going on? Is there a problem with the building project? With the men?"

Nearchus shook his head, catching his breath. "No, Hephaestion. Nothing like that. It's Alexander!"

Hephaestion's eyebrows creased with a slight frown. "What is wrong with him?"

"Oh, he is fine. In fact, he seems to be feeling especially energetic today." He hesitated.

"Then what is the problem exactly?" Hephaestion asked, confused.

"Hephaestion, if I may be blunt, he is driving us nuts. He is questioning everything we do and how we do it. He keeps making suggestions on ways to 'improve' our building methods. He keeps suggesting changes to the design you have laid out and trying to get our chief engineers to refigure the plans accordingly. The men are ready to string him up, and the engineers are threatening to quit."

Hephaestion groaned and shook his head, looking down at his feet. He had been afraid of this very thing. He sighed heavily. "Where is he now?"

Nearchus shook his head. "I'm not sure. He went in search of Perdiccas and Ptolemy…something about the wells we're supposed to be digging."

"I'll go and speak to him, Nearchus. You just continue on with things as they were. Tell the men there are no changes, and to proceed as planned. I'll deal with this."

Nearchus turned and headed back towards the docks, mumbling as he walked. "I certainly hope you do."

Hephaestion rubbed the back of his neck in frustration. Yes, he had been afraid this would happen. Now he had to go and put out the fires before he had a mutiny on his hands.


	4. Chapter 4

Hephaestion hadn't gotten very far before a frustrated looking Ptolemy stopped in front of him, blocking his path.

"Hephaestion! Thank the gods!"

"Not again…" Hephaestion mumbled. "I seem to be hearing that a lot this evening. Let me guess….Alexander?"

Ptolemy made a face and nodded.

Hephaestion sighed. "What has he done now?"

"The men are about ready to kill him. He decided we should move the completion date on the wells up a week, since things are going so well, and since he thinks that if we work a little harder we can get it done in half the time he had originally stated."

Hephaestion said nothing, but merely shook his head and rolled his eyes.

Ptolemy was clearly annoyed. "He also thinks it might be a good idea to build another series of wells farther down river, in the next town. I told him I didn't feel that was necessary and that he others should be adequate for our needs, but you know Alexander! If one is good, two is better." He stared hard at Hephaestion for a moment. "Perdiccas is keeping the men calm by assuring them that it will be okay, but they are about ready to revolt I think!"

"Okay, I get it. I'm on my way to go and speak with him now. I'll discuss this with him and see what I can do."

"Please do, Hephaestion. You're the only one he will listen to anyway when he gets like this." Ptolemy laid a hand on Hephaestion's shoulder and smiled ruefully. "Good luck my friend, I don't envy you at all."

"Gee, thanks" Hephaestion grumbled as he turned made his way to their council room, hoping to find Alexander as quickly as possible before he did any more damage.

He came upon Leonnatus as he stormed out of the dining hall. "Hephaestion!" his tone angry and sharp, "Do something with him, will you?"

Hephaestion groaned. He almost hated to ask. "What has he done?"

Leonnatus stomped his foot in frustration. "He wants to put the men through some drills. Hephaestion, we have been on constant alert and had battle after battle with all the tribes on our way down river, and not once have we failed or performed poorly! The men are tired and grumpy. This short break is very much needed. What we do NOT need is more drills!" He scowled and shook his head. "Drills! What on earth is he thinking?"

Hephaestion laid his hand on Leonnatus' shoulder and gave him a half smile. "Relax, my friend. There will be no drills." He sighed. "Let me handle this. You go and calm your men."

"Let's hope you are right, Hephaestion!" Leonnatus growled, and then turned and walked briskly in the direction of his men.

"Zues' balls!" Hephaestion cursed under his breath. He knew taking a day off was a bad idea. Taking a deep breath to calm himself, he entered the dining hall.

What he saw made him want to turn around and leave. Alexander was sitting on his couch, a big platter of bread and fruit in front of him with a large flagon of wine. Several scrolls littered the floor around the couch, and a set of plans and maps was laid out at Alexander's feet. He was excitedly explaining something to Craterus, who looked like he was about to spit nails.

That part made Hephaestion secretly happy. He enjoyed seeing Craterus mad. He didn't like the man anyway. Hephaestion nearly fainted when Craterus saw him and spoke up.

"Hephaestion! Boy am I glad to see you!"

"Well, there's something I'll never hear again" Hephaestion thought. He took a deep breath and made his way over to where Alexander sat. Alexander still hadn't noticed him, and apparently hadn't heard Craterus speak to him. He was too busy going over the changes he wanted made to the plans in front o f him.

"Alexander…" Hephaestion said softly.

Alexander's head whipped up and he turned, smiling widely as he saw Hephaestion standing there. "Hephaestion! You're back! How was your day off?"

"Alexander, would you come with me please? We need to talk"

"Sure, Hephaestion…is something wrong?"

Hephaestion sighed, trying not to frown. "I just need to talk to you. Would you come to my quarters please?"

Alexander stood, kicking aside a couple scrolls that had rolled near his feet. He turned and looked at the men seated around him. "It seems I am needed elsewhere. Health to you all, my friends!" He turned to Hephaestion. "After you" he motioned for Hephaestion to go.

As Hephaestion turned to leave, he caught Craterus' eye, and nearly fainted as the man mouthed "thank you" to him.

He had a feeling he would be busier than ever trying to fix everything that Alexander had stirred up. Now he just had to figure out a tactful way handling this. "Alexander, you will be the death of me" he mumbled under his breath as they left.


	5. Chapter 5

Hephaestion walked quickly towards his quarters with Alexander on his heels.

"So, Hephaestion, did you enjoy your day off?"

"Yes, I did Alexander. It was quite peaceful."

Alexander smiled, pleased with himself for suggesting it in the first place. "Wonderful! What did you do?"

Hephaestion's guards stepped aside for them to enter his quarters, and quietly closed the door after they were inside.

"Well? What did you do?"

Hephaestion leaned against the wall. "I took Damon and we went to the river. We played knucklebones, did some reading, and swam. It was most relaxing."

Alexander nodded. "You know the boy has a crush on you, right?"

""I do, but no matter. Alexander…I think I should ask, what did YOU do today?"

Alexander began chatting happily about everything he had accomplished today. He was talking rapidly, gesturing wildly with his hands, obviously happy with what he had done.

Hephaestion knew he had to think of something to shut him up, or else Alexander would go on and on for hours. He'd done it before. As Alexander launched into another speech about his day, Hephaestion stepped forward and pulled Alexander into his arms.

Alexander slid his arms around Hephaestion's waist, but kept talking non-stop.

"I told Nearchus we can redo part of the dock design, and…"

His words were cut off by Hephaestion's lips on his.

Hephaestion pulled back and smiled.

Alexander started up again.

"But Hephaestion, I think we could get this done in…mmmph…"

He words were once again swallowed up by Hephaestion's kiss.

As soon as Hephaestion broke the kiss, Alexander started talking again.

"I have another great idea for the wells! I think we should….mmmm….Heph…"

Hephaestion nibbled Alexander's lower lip and tugged it playfully.

Alexander's eyes were wide as he stared into the azure eyes of his favorite general.

But then he started talking again.

"Hephaestion, I told Leonnatus that the men needed…" he gasped as Hephaestion's hands slid down and gripped his hips, pulling him in tight. He was beginning to have trouble thinking.

"Ptolemy said…" a sharp intake of breath as Hephaestion's hand stroked down between his thighs. "I think…um, I mean…we should…mmmmmmm"

Hephaestion kissed Alexander's neck, a soft smile curving his lips. His little plan was working nicely. This was one sure way to refocus Alexander's attention. He was seducing him. That, he knew from experience, would shut him up for sure.

"Hephaestion, are you….oh gods…" Alexander panted as Hephaestion slipped his hand up under his chiton, taking him in hand.

He suddenly forgot what he was talking about. He clutched Hephaestion's shoulders for balance as the brunette general continued to caress him and nip at his shoulder. He made one last ditch effort to tell Hephaestion of his new ideas. "Hephaestion" he panted out, "I told Perdiccas…oh holy…" The stroking had become more bold. Alexander's knees were about to give out. "Hephaestion…I need to…gods…we should…"

"Alexander?" Hephaestion whispered against his ear.

"Mmmm?"

"Shut up."

Alexander did.

Sometime later, the two men lay entangled in each others arms on Hephaestion's bed. Alexander gently brushed a strand of sweat dampened hair from Hephaestion's eyes. "Hephaestion, you did that on purpose, didn't you? You were trying to shut me up, weren't you?"

Hephaestion grinned up at him. "Yes, and it worked."

Alexander looked perplexed. "But why? I was trying to tell you about…" he was stopped by Hephaestion's finger on his lips.

"Alexander, when I got back to the city, your generals…and half the men…were ready to run you through with a sarissa. I had to do something to stop you and keep them from killing you." Hephaestion smiled and pulled Alexander back down into his arms, kissing him tenderly on the forehead. "Alexander, everything was under control. All our plans are in place and working well, we are ahead of schedule, the men are doing fine…I don't think we need to change a thing."

Alexander grimaced. "Was I that bad?"

"I'm afraid so." Hephaestion nodded.

Alexander sighed. "I suppose I shouldn't try to do your job. You are quite good at it, and it seems all I did was leave a path of chaos and mayhem in my wake." He smiled. "I don't know how you do it all, Hephaestion, but I think I'll leave it in your capable hands."

Hephaestion smiled at him and chuckled softly. "Alexander, do something for me, will you?"

"Anything, Hephaestion! Anything!"

"The next time you feel the need to give me a day off…don't."

Alexander chuckled. "How about we make a deal? I'll still make you take days off, and you have permission to do whatever is necessary to keep me out of trouble." He grinned. "You seem to have a knack for, ah...taking matters into your own hands."

Hephaestion laughed loudly. "Deal!" He leaned over Alexander, pressing him back against the mattress. "You know, Alexander, I think YOU could use a day off. You've been a busy boy today."

"Mmmm...okay. What are my orders, General Amyntoros?"

Hephaestion smiled, a wicked twinkle in his eyes. "You are hereby confined to my quarters. You are not to do any work. And..." he grinned, "you are to do everything the nice General tells you to do." He slid his hand up Alexander's thigh. "Do we have a deal?"

"Hephaestion?"

"Yes, Alexander?"

"Shut up."

Hephaestion did.


End file.
